By Bye Bye
by Validor
Summary: PG-13 for slight yaoi...Zoisite and the DK gang act out the video for "Bye Bye Bye," but with a twist. I like this one!


Bye Bye Bye stolen from N'Sync  
  
by Validor  
it helps if you have seen the music video for this one. I used Japanese and English names.  
"Ah ha ha ha, my kings! I have news for you!" Queen Beryl cackled.  
'Kuso!' thought Malachite, a tall young man with long, silver hair. He bowed deeply and said, "Yes, my queen."  
"As you know, you used to be the faithful generals of Prince Endymion during the Silver Millennium, in the manga version anyway."  
Zoycite, pretty little king with dishwater blond hair and emerald eyes, growled. 'Blast that Darien! How dare he refuse my advances?! He'll pay for turning my down!'  
"What you don't know," Beryl continued, "is that you all had girlfriends back then! Yes, even Zoyzite!"  
Nephrite, a king with wavy brown hair and a penchant for young earth girls with Brooklyn accents, laughed derisively.   
"Shut up Nephrite! I wasn't done yet!" Beryl snapped.  
"Forgive me, my queen."  
"And what's more, your girlfriends were the Sailor Scouts!"  
"Nooooooo! Please your majesty, tell me it isn't so!" Jadeite, the only king with short blond hair, cried.  
"Ah ha ha ha! Do you think I'd make up something like that? It's bad for morale!"  
"Then why did you tell us?" Malachite wondered aloud.  
"Because it'll become important later! Now, get out of my sight, you beautiful worthless bishonen kings!!!"   
"Yes, Queen Beryl!" they chorused. Then the four kings disappeared.  
****  
Later, Kunzite, Zoisite, Nephrite, and Jadeite were in Nephrite's room sampling his stock of vintage...lemonade.  
"It's not fair!" Zoicite whined. "Why can't they just give me a gender and a personality and stick with it?"  
"How do you think I feel? I have to be your boyfriend!"  
"And my name!" Zoicyte continued. "It's been butchered! Look, it's changed five times in this story!"  
"Don't worry, love. I'm sure the author of this fic will get it straightened out soon. I mean, how many ways can you spell 'Zoyzyte' NEwayz?"  
*I don't know, Malachite. Let's find out!*  
"Who was that?!" Jadeite exclaimed.  
"Who cares? Gundam Wing's on!" Nephrite and the rest of the gang settled down to watch their favorite show.  
"Malachite?"  
"Hm?"  
"Can I braid your hair? Duo's hair is so cool!"  
"Hmph," Nephrite snorted. "I suppose you think Quatre's a stud too."  
"Well, he's cute, but with the pink shirt, and the constant crying, and the sentiment, he's just too...too.. too..." Zoisyte struggled to find the right word.  
"Too feminine?" Jadeite suggested.  
"Yes! That's it!"  
Everyone else sweatdropped.  
"Zechs, on the other hand, reminds me of my sweetie-pie Malachite!"  
"Zoysyte! Shut up, please!"  
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door.  
"Open up!" came a high, girly voice. It was quickly obscured by high, girly giggles.  
"What the heck?"  
"Nephrite? What's going on?"  
"In the name of the Moon!"  
"In the name of Mercury!"  
"In the name of Mars!"  
"In the name of Jupiter!"  
"In the name of Venus!"  
"We'll capture you, you lovely bishonen!"  
"It's those blasted Sailor Scouts!" Jadeite realized.   
"Kuso! Right in the middle of Gundam Wing, too. And this is the episode where Trieze takes a bubble bath!" muttered Zoycyte.  
"Frankly, that scene always frightens me," Nephrite confessed.  
"What gets me," began Jadeite, "is Lady Une. She just stands there, all calm and everything, but you know she loves him..."  
"Oh boys! Your Silver Millennium girlfriends are here!"  
"Yeah, and we're about to break down the door!"  
"Jupiter Thunder Crash!"  
"Can it wait?" asked Malachite. "We were about to get into an interesting discussion concerning the nature of Treize and Lady Une's relationship."  
"NO! We want to catch bishonen and we want to catch them now!"  
"That door won't hold much longer!" Zoecyte (*ha ha*) worried. "And what the heck is the author doing to my name?"  
"The stars know everything, and they have warned my about this new craze. It's called Pocket Bishonen, and people try to catch and train anime guys."  
Everyone sweatdropped (again).  
"So...what did the stars tell you to do about it?" Malachite asked.  
"RUN!"  
They ran.   
Then they remembered that they could teleport.  
"Bye bye bye, silly Sailor Scouts!" Zoe taunted. "And my name's not Zoe!"  
'Oh, so that's where the title comes in,' Nephrite mused. He didn't have much time to dwell on this, though, as he and the three other kings realized that the Scouts had followed them onto a train.  
I'm doin' this tonight  
Prob'ly gonna start a fight  
I know this can't be right  
Hey baby come on!  
"Here!" Malachite and Zoycite ('Ha! You started over!' the blond king thought to the author) ducked into a seat.  
"They're coming!" Malachite hissed frantically as the frightening Scouts peered through the crowds in the train car.  
Zoisite grabbed Malachite's head and pulled him down into a passionate kiss.  
"Oh, so sorry! Excuse me!" Sailor Moon stammered. She didn't recognize the back of Malachite's head. The two kings ignored her.  
The scene switched, and Nephrite and Jadeite appeared in a constantly shifting silver room. One minute the floor was the wall, and the next minute it was the ceiling.  
"Oh, for heaven's sake! Don't tell me we have to dance too! This wasn't in my contract!" Jadeite wailed.  
*I could always kill you off...or make you fall in love with Nephrite!*  
"Sheesh, I'm dancing! I'm dancing!" Jadeite started bobbing his head and waving his arms around in a way that vaguely conveyed the concept of dancing.  
"Wait! Where's Malachite?" Nephrite demanded.  
"Last I saw he was...oh kuso. You go get him!"  
"No, you go get him!"  
"You go!"  
"Why should I?"  
"Because I have a weak stomach! You're the only one strong enough to handle it!"  
Nephrite grumbled and vanished back to the train. Seeing Malachite and Zoycite still busy, he cleared his throat loudly. No response.  
"Hey Malachite!"  
No response.  
Nephrite pulled Zoisyte up by his now rather messy pony tail.  
"Cut it out, you two!" Nephrite yelled. "We've got some dancing to do!"  
"Oh, sorry!" Zoycyte gasped, brushing hair out of his eyes. Malachite blushed and mumbled something but Zoisite just grinned. The three kings joined Jadeite in the strange room.  
"'Bout time," he said to the still red-faced king and his smirking student.  
"Just start the music!" Malachite ordered.  
"Sure thing, Lord Malachite!" Jadeite took his place in front and started his part of the song while the others did synchronized boy band like dance moves behind him. Their mortified expressions showed just how much fun they were having. Jadeite, however, was now digging his new role as a teen idol. He sang out the lyrics with such emotion and looked so hot that Zoycite almost swooned and missed a few steps. Nephrite rolled his eyes.  
I know that I can't take no more  
It ain't no lie  
I wanna see you out that door   
Baby bye bye bye  
The scene switched back to the train. Nephrite and Jadeite were on the roof of it, running from Sailor Mars and Sailor Jupiter.  
I loved you endlessly   
But you weren't there for me  
So now it's time to leave and make it alone  
"Bishie ball, go!" Mars yelled.  
"AHHHHHHHHH!" Nephrite and Jadeite jumped off the train.  
Kunzite and his love ran through a factory, hotly pursued by Sailors Moon, Mercury, and Venus.  
"Hey Moon Brat! Isn't Cape Boy good enough for you?" Zoisite asked.  
"Sure, but what kind of friend would I be if I didn't help my buds catch bishonen?"  
"A sane friend?" Malachite suggested.  
"Silly Nega-scum! Now get in your Bishie balls!"  
"AHHHHHHHHH!" yelled Malachite. He threw some wicked cool purple boomerangs, but to no avail. Zoisite, meanwhile, was busy pondering what the Scouts had said.  
"Bishie balls?" he giggled. "Would those be anything like, Dragonballs, or are we talking about something totally different?"   
Malachite grabbed his arm and pulled him out of harm's way. They resumed their flight through the warehouse type building.  
Don't really wanna make it tough  
I just wanna tell ya that I've had enough  
You may hate my but it ain't no lie  
Baby bye bye bye!  
Once again, the scene switched to the tilting room. Jed, Neph, Mal, and Zoi were still dancing, and Jadeite was still doing all the lead vocals. Nephrite wondered if Malachite was noticing the wistful glances Zoisite was casting in Jadeite's direction. Now that Jadeite was going to be in all the teen girl celebrity magazines, the emerald-eyed king had taken a new interest in his colleague. Malachite was looking very angry. Yeah, he had noticed!  
Something I can't remember right now  
I don't wanna be the reason for your love no more  
Bye bye bye!  
Malachite and Zoisite stopped running through the factory.   
"My feet are killing me!" Zoisite complained.  
"No, no, my little koibito! We can't stop now! Do you want to spend the rest of your life complying with the every whim of some bishonen-crazy girl with no brain?"  
"Well, no, but I don't want to spend the rest of my life running either...Do you know how hard it is to run in these boots?"  
"We've got you now!" Sailor Venus yelled in triumph.  
Suddenly, Malachite got an idea.  
"Look!" he exclaimed. "It's Darien and Andrew!"  
"Where?!"  
"Over there! Hurry before they get away!"  
Sailor Moon and Sailor Venus took off. Malachite had to hold Zoisite back. "I'm just kidding you baka! Do you have to run after guy you see?"  
Zoisite blushed. "Sorry."  
But Sailor Mercury wasn't fooled. She stood between Malachite and Zoisite and the door to freedom.  
"I give up!" Zoisite wailed. "Go ahead! Catch me, train me, whatever! Just don't make me run anymore!"  
"Um, no offense," said Mercury, "but you're not really my type. Besides, I'm not really in the market for a boyfriend."  
"Really!?" Zoisite looked relieved. Then his expression changed. "You're not in the market for a girlfriend, are you?" he asked suspiciously.  
Mercury wrinkled her nose. "Nope. I'd just rather have a guy who has more brains that good looks."  
"Then why are you trying to catch bishonen?" Malachite asked, puzzled.  
"I gotta do what the Moon Princess says," she shrugged. "You guys better leave, before Sailor Moon and Sailor Venus realize they've been duped."  
"Y'know," said Zoisite, "I might thank you, if I was a polite person."  
"You're welcome," Sailor Mercury bowed. Then the two Negaverse lovers disappeared.  
"I don't wanna be your fool, in this game for two," Jadeite sang.   
So I'm leavin' you behind   
bye bye bye!  
The other guys sang, danced, and fell down in the tilting room.  
I don't wanna make it tough  
but I've had enough   
And it ain't no lie  
Bye bye  
Jadeite and Nephrite fell out of the sky.  
"AHHHHHHH!" Two feet above the ground, they suddenly stopped falling. Gently, they used their magic to lower themselves to the ground. Coincidentally, they had landed right next to Nephrite's red-hot kick-@$$ Ferrari.  
"You scream like a girl," Nephrite commented as they got into the car and sped away.  
A few minutes later, another red car came puttering down the road. It was Darien, along with Jupiter and Mars.  
"Uh, girls," said Dairen as the car came to a sputtering stop, "I think it's out of gas."  
"That's okay," said Sailor Mercury, fluttering her eyelashes at her ex-boyfriend.  
"Rats!" said Jupiter from the back seat. "I'll just get out and see if I can flag down someone to help us before Nephrite and Jadeite get away."  
The first car to come along was actually a motorcycle.  
"Hey, Amara!" Jupiter yelled.  
"Oh, hey," said Amara, the girl on the motorcycle. Behind her sat another girl with wavy blue-green hair.  
"We're stuck," Jupiter explained.  
"Gee, too bad. Well, gotta jet. See ya, kitten!"  
Amara and Michelle took off.  
Bye bye bye! 


End file.
